The following is purely speculation and in no way should be considered concrete facts unless future evidence proves otherwise.
I originally wanted this CWDP, in particular, to be a one part only post. It didn't end up that way and MJ has a lot on her plate right now...so I want to continue what the rest of the session entailed and go further into my thoughts about it. I also feel it needs to be out there and so I am going to go with my feeling and write this portion of the session.
I first want to make clear how very difficult this was for me to put out into the world. I have never lost sleep over a session...but I did with this one. Not only because of what I felt and saw in session, but also because my first thought was for the one person in the middle of all of this story- Frances. I did not want to sensationalize or have this come off as another theory or story out there concerning something that at the end of the day, is none of our business. I know that sounds harsh...but when it comes down to it...the only people that truly matter are the people who knew him...family...daughter...close friends. So I struggled with what came forward and speaking it. I also struggled with fear of putting all of it out there. I asked my guides repeatedly and I got the answer each time...go forward.
Here is the rest of the session between MJ and I. I, obviously, will be leaving out names for legal and protective reasons. I really feel that this second part of the session, that Kurt really came through strong. There are words here...and a thread of thought that are not the way I speak...or words that I use. I always become amazed when I go back after a session and witness that. No matter how many times I have connected with a spirit, it still stirs and moves me to see their essence on earth move through me. Humbling. Very humbling.
MJ- Let's start by thanking him for being with us and that we are very honored to be speaking with him and to try to share the message that he really wants to be shared.
AMY- (long pause) He's basically giving the attitude that there is nothing to thank...just he's ready.
MJ- Is he comfortable naming the person that he was close to that was involved in this?
MJ: And what does (redacted) look like?
AMY- He's got...and this is what I got from having not seen completely whole face...seeing eyes, he's got dark brown hair...what looked to maybe be darker eyes...they were larger as compared to squinty. They weren't squinty eyes. He kind of looked like he could have some kind of Italian...he definitely didn't look like Kurt. He was the complete opposite of coloring eyes and hair wise. Definite druggie looking...sorry to say that...I don't mean that as a derogatory term. Junkie Looking.
MJ- Okay...then when it comes to the other person, the bad dude that you had mentioned...
AMY- This dude, I don't know his name or who he is. There was no name that came forward with him. But I will say he is good looking...and scary looking. You can just look at him and tell that is not a good person. He was broad chested and I kept seeing his biceps...well built...he had guns. He was in good shape.
MJ- Okay...so he was like a hired hitman?
AMY- Um...he actually told me something about...maybe used to go to a club or a bar all the time that was known in the circle. Not friends with him...but was known in the circle of friends. He also showed me a heavier set woman that was pointing a finger and saying something like this to him( goes on pointing like being chewed out or told what to do)...yeah...he didn't like her very much. He also showed me a face of a man in his 50's-60's....olive toned skin...very tan skinned, leathery man with big eyes. Definitely had more of worn look to his face, so may have looked older than what he actually is. Super tan and rugged look. I feel like he is some corporate guy...had something to do with the industry for sure. I think these are all people that at the end of the day he lumps together as responsible for what ended up being. That is the last face he showed.
MJ- Hypothetically...if it was her that planned all of it...does he think that she kind of fucked herself over?
AMY- He's saying...you have to understand the dichotomy of (redacted). She is someone who can ...you will never meet another person who will cause you to love her and hate her all in the same moment. She's this wounded child wrapped up in hyper sexuality. That had a spell on people. Because she was so larger than life...and so boisterous and so controlling and so manipulative...she could spin a web like you would not believe. And people that should have had more intelligence would actually be caught up in it. He's actually showing me( cringes) a spider...a big black spider with a thousand babies on its back...in a web. um...like there was no end to her crazy clown-ness...and she would literally have an idea for something...and she could in that moment be able to see that she is not convincing the other person of it...and so she would automatically be able to switch and do what ever it took to spin the web. So the babies on the spider's back represent how many things she had in her arsenal...capabilities she had to manipulate and almost cast a spell on people.
He's telling me she is suffering now...at the beginning she still was so caught up...and she always will be, he is saying, he wants to make that clear that she doesn't have it in her to feel true consciousness of something. There's always a story...there's always an excuse...there's always a manipulation...so she wouldn't even be the type person that could sit there...(hypothetically) in her own conscience and say " Wow, I hired someone to ....how horrible is that.." She doesn't have that in her to have a conscience to track down what she has done. She only has it in her to have victimization and a reason for why she did things and it's all about her. Always. Always. So...did she screw herself over? Um...he doesn't think that is something that she would ever accept. Even if she got arrested and spent the rest of her life in jail, she would still be spinning some plot from the jail cell. Some kind of publicity...some kind of story...some kind of something to get all eyes back on her. So...(laugh) he is kind of telling me the joke that that is a loaded question! Kind of doing it like a pun...(laughs).
MJ- The reason I ask isn't even because of what is being said...is because of a documentary by a private eye that she hired...and she hired him when she said that Kurt was missing in the few first days before his death and he completely saw through her from the very beginning to where he said ...like...this makes no sense...so he started recording all of their meetings.
AMY- WOW. (long pause) Again...he is saying you have to understand her...she got off on this stuff. She never would have been able to admit inside of herself that she couldn't outsmart someone...even if they had her number. She always thought that she would outsmart. She always thought that she would get the final word...she was a puppet master like that. Um...and he is also allowing me to hear her saying, you know, "Just keep your mouth shut..." You know...she was 100% confident that if everyone could just keep their shit together that it would work out the way it needed to. And so...she sent people off...I am getting that too....she knew she could keep her shit together and the ones she felt couldn't, she got ...rid of...I don't know if that means physically or what.
MJ- Okay...well, it is in my opinion...and I know his friends did not feel he was suicidal...um...I do believe that the main reason that we have even an idea that he didn't kill himself is because of this private detective. Only because he was so close to the case as it was happening and he has all of this information. And back then, you know...you couldn't get...not only could you not google pictures of crime scenes...the Seattle Police Department didn't even release the crime scene photos until this year. Which was kind of a big deal. So back then it was literally like, you heard it on the radio and you saw what they said on MTV about it and that was the information you got. So I think that without his angle that he brought to the case, it wouldn't even necessarily be even an idea that maybe Kurt didn't take his own life and I find it kind of some bitter sweet justice there if she thought she was playing another game...or weaving another web, but she was really the one who brought the right attention to it by hiring him.
AMY- And yet, here we are with nothing done about it...so did she? Or did she not? He's giving her a slow clap right now. Like he literally is like ( proceeds to do a slow clap)...he thinks she did a brilliant job. He is actually saying " I have to hand it to her..." That's what he is saying.
MJ- I am trying to figure out, since he came up with so much up front...there is very little I have to ask...the one that is pulling at me is what our message is going to be?
AMY- He doesn't have one. He wants to point out to you and he is talking to you because you are asking the question...he wants to point out to you that that is what frustrated him his whole entire life was people reading too much into who he was...reading too much into what he was creating...reading too much into...you know, he was just a man...that wanted to make music. You know. That was all he wanted. And so...if you want to take a message out of it, the message should be the very thing that...if the people who followed him really care about him the way they say that they do...then they will understand that taking that care and doing something productive about it...instead of worshiping him...is what he wants. Because the other is the very thing that literally made him sick to his stomach at times. It was a catch 22...because he knows he couldn't have made the music that he made without that...but even at the end, he didn't want to make that music anymore. He didn't want to be that person anymore. He wanted free of that persona...but he wants it known...that if anyone wants proof that he wouldn't have taken his life...look at his daughter. Look at his daughter.
And he wants it said that it is not that he wasn't capable of it. He ...he had thought about it in the past...of just...you know...what it would be like to leave this world and the struggles and this inner conflict that was constant...because he was super, super sponge like sensitive. With so many thoughts going through his head. And it was kind of this back and forth too of liking people...but not liking them. Like...he was a good hearted, nice person and liked people...but he didn't like that human side of fame and greed and corporate too. So, he doesn't really have a message...the mission is the message. You know...instead of things being spoon fed... he just wants people to figure it out on their own. You know...20 years later...he's saying the world has evolved and people should be evolving with it. And figure it out...come to your own conclusion of what it was that he was about...because what you think he was about is sometimes opposite of what he was. Take the time to get to know what he was...and he is saying there are many that do...and he is very appreciative of that...he doesn't want to come off sounding like a dick, he is saying(laughs). He wants (long pause) he wants everyone...this is the message...everyone take the love for him and the music and the support that they have given over the years...which he does appreciate...and take that and use it as an energy to move things forward in the direction that they need to go. That will give something to hold at the end of the day for all of that...because right now...all there is a CD...a picture...a poster...if they will take that energy and pour it into petitioning again...and phone calls...letters...they will have in their hands that they made a difference. That is what he wants. He is saying the energy is useless because he wasn't worth it. He is saying...I mean...he wasn't worthy of all of that. It wasn't right for him to receive and have received all of that. But if it is going to come...let it come in the form of making a change because of it. Setting things in motion that the only way they could be set in motion is by THE POWER OF THE PEOPLE.
He is at peace. when he came to me last night, I audibly heard in my ear the word "Purple"...and I was like, what does that mean? Then I realized oh wow...that probably is... I feel he was just showing me the whole Prince connection...the whole "spark of divinity" ...that that is working in conjunction with this.
He also, which was pretty amazing to me, after he showed all of these...and you know...I am up for hours...I finally, it was like maybe 3:30-4:00 in the morning, he kept coming to me showing me little things...memories...and I kept feeling him come in and out...and every time I did...it smelled like someone was smoking cigarettes...I finally said " I hope you don't mind, I am going to disconnect now. I really need to go to sleep now...I have a long day tomorrow and if you are going to ask me to do this, I want to have the strength and the clarity of mind to be able to do it." I just thanked him and sent love to him and right when I was about to drift off to sleep, he sent me an image...and I wish that I could explain to people...it is difficult...it sounds nuts...I know it sounds nuts and insane and it is hard to explain unless you have ever experienced it...but when you are given a flash image of something...which is how I see so much of my stuff...I mean it is literally like a polaroid image in my third eye...in my mind's eye that I see. He flashed me, quickly, my name and it was on a beach. I could see the sand and the waves coming in...and my first letter "A" was a pyramid...my "M" was this tall legged "M" with the top peaks being much smaller...and my "Y" was in cursive with a loop at the bottom. And I remember seeing a rainbow...so he was like "Ammmmyyyyy!!!" just saying bye one more time...like waving bye...and that is what he drew for me. That was the last image I had before I fell asleep. It made me smile and I said to him " You're a...you're a rock star!" (laughing) It is an image that I will...I think he wanted me to see last an image that I would always remember, because I always will...and the feeling it gave me...because that kind of erased away the darkness I had to see and the darkness I had to feel. Like that was his parting gift to me. And I am going to recall it...every time I need...I felt like I had just received, you know...a letter from outer space...it was like he kind of just gave me an art piece of my name that was specifically how he wanted to write it. It was awesome.
AMY: When I went to his house in Seattle...I went to the lot next door and sat on a bench...connecting...there was flowers left and stuff written all over the place. It was obviously a shrine to him...as I sat there...car after car just pulled up. I sat at the far away bench that was by a walking path...and the bench in front of the tree it was just one after the other of people coming and sitting. Mostly women, there was one guy. The rest were women. And to tell you the truth, after connecting with him...I can understand...I never would have been able to understand looking at his picture...like what is the hold he has? But feeling his spirit...I understand...he was special. He was special and he was...the way he made me feel when connecting with his spirit was that when he looked at you...when he did choose to look at you and give his attention...you had his everything. And you felt that. When he looked in your eyes...you felt special. Like you had all of him...and I think that is the key of his essence when he was in body.
On an end note...one last thing he allowed me to hear was justification from the ones responsible...as they were planning out and implementing that plan...saying " He hates his life. He wants out. He has wanted out before. He doesn't even f'ing like life. ..." He wants it known that he loved his daughter. He loved music. He wasn't leaving his life. He just wanted to leave the fame. At the end...it was a convenient way to pin his exit on him...and end up with it all. That should be enough for anyone...
If you missed part one, here is the link: http://www.themjpack.com/conversations-with-dead-people-a-mediums-session-with-kurt-cobain/
It is very intense. There is also a petition link on there to sign for reopening the case.